Lost Woman
by Anne Tonkin
Summary: Hero; noun. A person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities. A bunch of bullshit in Faith's opinion. She had a taste of "heroism", of admiration and idealization. She understood what that all felt like. And then it all went away. She wanted it to go away. Heroes were. . .outdated, according to her. -Part I of the Infinity Series.-
1. Chapter I: Faith Mikaelson

Don't know where to run to,  
Don't know where to hide.  
See my future coming,  
Like the rising of the tide.

-Lost Woman; **by The Yardbirds**

* * *

Giving a heavy, drawn-out sigh, Faith ran a hand through her hair. Her other hand was placed on top of her desk, her fingers drumming angrily on the wooden surface. For the last half hour, Faith was attempting to read the book in front of her. She was desperately looking at the words, hoping she'd come to some kind of understanding. It was proving impossible, though. The longer she looked at the words, the more pages she flipped through, the less she understood. The less she seemed to know, which was infuriating in Faith's eyes, since she prided herself in knowing a lot.

_I paid a lot for this book,_ Faith thought bitterly, _and I can't read a single word in this damn thing._

Growing up, Faith learned how to read, write, and speak in Latin. That had been her very first language, with English being her second. She never really took the time to learn other languages, since Latin was the one thing that helped her with what she could do. Well, that and concentration. But the book Faith was reading, the one she'd wasted so much time trying to read, was written in another language. From what she could tell, the book was French in origin. There were some parts she recognized as having some French _Creole_, but the rest was written in just plain French.

_I could just use a spell that helps me translate this,_ Faith thought. _Or use another spell to convert it into Latin._

Wouldn't _that_ be easy? Leaning back in her chair, Faith let her head roll back, her hair going from around her face and shoulders to around her office chair. Spells were her specialty, among other things. A good amount of what Faith could do could be done with a lot more ease thanks to what she could do. She only _chose_ not to do it that way out of fears and anxieties of getting caught and the unnerving feeling that she was cheating to get by in life. Faith's abilities made her very different when compared to other humans — yes, she's a human — and that made her feel almost like an outsider. Part of her enjoyed living a monotonous life, but was anxious when it came to hiding her powers. That part of her craved normalcy, the mundane that came with living an unassuming life. But another part of Faith was _proud_ of what she was. That part held no shame, no anxiety or uncertainty. That part loved the abilities she possessed, wanting to go back to when she was a hero; back to when she was recognized as such.

That was something Faith always hated about herself — her conflicting sides. Should she accept herself and, most importantly, her abilities? Or should she shun her powers, ignoring who she is, in favor of the mundane? It was a difficult decision, one Faith couldn't quite answer yet. It had taken the twenty-two year old years to get over most of the bullshit she endured as a child and teenager, though she still had a ways to go. It took her equally as long to figure out all the appropriate mannerisms and behaviors that came with living in the real world; not in the world her family grew up in. The real world outside the mansion, where people were trying to live their lives the best they could. Where superheroes and enhanced people were easily tossed aside once they lost their relevance.

After Faith left home, she learned rather quick just how irrelevant heroes could be in the eyes of many. Society — civilians — could go from one to the next without batting an eye, deciding which is the best choice for all of them and who would help lead them to a new era of peace. Which was baffling. That part of Faith, the one who was proud of her powers and who _she_ was, specifically before leaving home, didn't want to believe such a thing could exist in the real world. How could the people she — and her siblings — once kept safe toss them aside like garbage? From robbers to the Eiffel Tower, Faith did everything in her power to ensure the safety and peace. Her siblings put in just as much effort. And they were _children_ at the time.

Letting out another sigh, Faith pushed her chair out and sat up. She had enough. She couldn't go from trying to decipher the book to thinking about her childhood; it wasn't right. Thoughts like that weren't going to help her.* Thinking about her family wouldn't get her any closer to translating what was written in that goddamn book.

Going over to her bedroom door, Faith opened it and nearly jumped out of her skin. Her roommate, Philippa, stood at the other end. At the sight of the twenty-two year old's reaction, Philippa merely chuckled.

"I was just coming to check on you. Is everything okay?"

Nodding, Faith tried for a smile, one of her hands clutching her chest, her hand placed over her heart. "I'm taking a break right now," Faith said. "I think I just scrambled my brain from being in here for so long."

Nodding Philippa smiled in return. "If you need any help, I'm always here," she offered. "I know you don't speak French, so if you want, I can translate whatever's in the book."

"No, it's okay, Phil." Faith waved her roommate off all the while keeping her tone light and friendly. That was one of the many things the twenty-two year old appreciated about Philippa; she was ready to help at a moment's notice. It was a nice quality to have, but when it came to trying to decipher a book of spells, Faith didn't want to risk anything happening. Even if what Philippa read aloud in the book didn't result in anything, it was a risk the young woman couldn't take. "I'll figure it out, no worries," Faith added.

With a careful nod, the smile on Philippa's face looked more forced. "Well do you want to go out for lunch?" she asked. "Or did you want take out? I know there's that Chinese place a few blocks down you like, if you want that."

Faith's face lit up at that.

**-0 0 0 0-**

It hadn't been very long after Faith left home that she ran into Philippa. The two had been taking community transit, both being young and inexperienced in how to survive in the world. Philippa had told Faith the story of how her parents, wealthy French immigrants, had attempted to plan out their daughter's entire life without her say-so. In the end, her parents kicked her out once she turned eighteen. She left without looking back. For Faith, she found that to be astonishing; how some parents could easily throw their kids into the world simply because of their beliefs. When it came time for Faith to tell _her_ story, however, that's when it became complicated. At the time of her leaving the Hargreeves estate, the "youngest" of the siblings — despite all of them being the same age — told a somewhat vague story about her home life and upbringing. Faith tried to keep all the juicy details out, not wanting to dive right in that she was a Hargreeves.

It wasn't like Philippa noticed or even _cared_ anyway.

But it was in that moment, while Faith was telling a girl she barely knew her life story, that a thought came into her mind. A somewhat impulsive thought, but one that made sense the more she rationalized it. Faith spent her whole life believing that being the adopted daughter of Reginald Hargreeves made her special. That superhero-loving-power-advocate part of Faith had the same kind of mentality as her brother, Luther. She was willing to work herself to the bone just to make the Academy work. Just for there to be _some_thing in her life. It took a while for her to wake up from that train of thought, though they do pop in every once in a while. God, but that impulsive, yet rationalized, thought that Faith had. It made sense to her. It was something that could be done without batting an eye.

Faith would change her last name. She would no longer be Faith _Hargreeves_, she'd be Faith _Mikaelson_. That had been her decision upon meeting Philippa. The life she had at the Academy, the life she had with her adoptive family, it would all be put behind her. While she couldn't quite push aside some of the memories or feelings — or the unusual circumstances of her birth and her abilities — Faith could try and make the best of what she had. She had a new friend, someone who was willing to be there from the beginning. Philippa didn't have to stick around, but she did. She didn't have to treat Faith with such kindness, but she did.

_I'll forever be in her debt,_ Faith would think. And it's true. Faith could spend her entire life trying to repay Philippa's kindness, but it would never be enough.

**-0 0 0 0-**

The two women chose Chinese take out. There was a little Chinese place not far from where Faith and Philippa lived that delivered take out to anyone who ordered. The food was good and cheap, which was surprising. Faith remembered having plenty of take out that had been absolutely terrible, but then again, she'd been living in different places at the time. With Philippa there, of course.

"I thought you were starting a diet," Faith asked, shoveling some dumplings in her mouth.

Playfully rolling her eyes, Philippa picked at some sweet and sour chicken. "I can start another time," she said. "Besides, you know I'm a sucker for good Chinese food."

"That's true."

"I've been meaning to ask," Philippa went on, pouring some white rice onto her plate, "what's your fascination with witchcraft? I've noticed you have a lot of books on spells and everything. Not to mention you're fluent in Latin and everything."

That question — that _statement_ — had Faith's blood run cold. Philippa never asked those kinds of questions. She knew there were parts of Faith's life she didn't talk about, and the seemingly odd obsession with witchcraft was never brought up. And in all honesty, how could Faith just casually mention she can cast spells? Or use telekinesis or telepathy or empathy or _any_thing? That's not something people just _bring_ up in conversation.

"I've always had an interest in it," Faith responded, keeping her tone cool and collected. "The history, all the myths and everything; I could never stop looking into it."

Humming, Philippa ate a forkful of rice, thinking it over. "Do you celebrate the Pagan holidays?" she asked. "I've never heard you mention them."

"I don't celebrate the holidays." Faith shook her head. "I'm not into that."

"Just everything else?"

"Pretty much. Why?"

Philippa shrugged. "That was the one thing about you that stood out the most," she said. "You've always had books and journals and all these little witchy things. I could never understand _why_ you were into it so much."

_It's basically who I am. It's what my father instilled into me. I'm a witch without officially being a witch._ "I'm just curious, that's all." Faith tried for a smile, "I don't know why, though."

"Whatever you want to do, you know I don't judge."*

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**(A/N):**

**Sorry for the wait on the chapter. Hopefully you guys found some enjoyment in it. Other than that, leave constructive criticism where you think it's due.**

**Do I own anything in the MCU? No. No I don't. All I own are my OCs, my subplots, and the laptop I'm typing on. If you've got ideas for OCs or subplots, be sure to PM me or leave a review. I'll put them in as soon as possible.**

**I know this first chapter may seem a bit sloppy, but I'm trying to find my footing right now. So hopefully you guys can help me in terms of getting better at my writing. Whatever ideas, suggestions, etc. you've got would be incredibly helpful.**

**For those of you who've seen Endgame, what were your thoughts? How do you feel knowing that the main six are, for the most part, done?**

**Other than that, I'll see you guys soon, my dudes.**

**Leave a random fact in the reviews if you want. It could be on something old or new. Whatever you want.**

**Anne Tonkin**


	2. Chapter II: Who Are You?

_Listen to the pain. It's both history teacher and fortune teller. Pain teaches us who we are, Wade. Sometimes it's so bad, we feel like we're dying. But we can't really live 'till we've died a little, can we?_

-Blind Al; **from Deadpool 2** (2018)

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Part of Faith's story begins on the day of her birth, October 1, 1989. That day sparked a worldwide phenomena, a kind of frenzy of sorts. On the twelfth hour of the first day of October 1989, forty three women around the world gave birth. The strange part was none of the women had been pregnant when the day first began. Faith's birth mother had been one of those women. No one had the slightest clue on _why_ the women suddenly gave birth or _how_ they seemed to spontaneously conceive. It just sort of _happened_. But as the years rolled on, the mystery around the odd births slowly dwindled until it was all but forgotten. That doesn't mean there aren't scientists still baffled by it, but it's not as widely discussed as it used to be. Not to mention that a lot of those newborns were either put up for adoption or abandoned. Needless to say, no one has a clear number on how many of those children survived into adulthood let alone adolescence.

Of course, the world had definitive proof that at least _eight_ of those mystery children were still alive. Well, _seven_ according to Reginald. He only wanted to include those he found useful.

Another part of Faith's story began _shortly_ after her birth. It began shortly after the births of _all_ the children. Reginald Hargreeves, an eccentric billionaire and adventurer, made it his mission to find and adopt as many of the forty-three children as possible. He only got eight of them. Faith was the eighth and final child he adopted. Which meant, for the first thirteen years of Faith's life, she was only known as "Number Eight". Reginald named each of his children depending on their usefulness and the order in which they were adopted. Apparently magic and other mystical abilities were seen as less useful in Reginald's eyes.

But, getting back on track, Faith's story really began to pick up momentum shortly after her birth. She was the eighth child adopted by Reginald Hargreeves, and she was raised alongside her seven other siblings in her father's mansion. Faith's birth mother had been given a large sum of money in return for allowing Reginald to raise her daughter. It was a heart-wrenching fact to learn later in life, but one she had to accept. Life would be full of heart-wrenching things.

The next part of Faith's life was growing up not only with seven adopted siblings, but with Reginald as her adopted father. Reginald was a difficult man to be around; an individual who showed no interest in having children, biological or otherwise. The _last_ person who should be around even a _single_ kid let alone _eight_. And the way the Hargreeves kids were treated — Faith didn't acknowledge it at first. She didn't _want_ to see it. But as she got older, as she started to really distance herself from what she held dear, Faith began to understand. Reginald was a very strict man; cold and distant, as well. He somehow knew that the children he took in had superpowers. No one had the slightest idea on how he knew; he just _did_. But he had carefully planned out training sessions for each of the Hargreeves kids. He documented every little thing, from the biggest achievement to the littlest setback. The sessions only got harder as they got older, as their powers began to progress. And as they began to have control over their abilities, Reginald began putting them to work — the Hargreeves children would be sent out to fight crime.

Faith could recall a number of heroic feats she'd accomplished when she was younger. From robbers to the Eiffel Tower, it was astonishing, how insane the world truly was. As a child, however, Faith was easily blinded by the differences she experienced at the mansion compared to the chaos happening in the world. In a way, she felt empowered, knowing she had so much control over what happened in the world. Faith could use her magic to set things right. Bad guys wouldn't stand a chance. But at the same time, she felt out of place. When she compared herself to the bad guys she fought, Faith had to keep in mind they weren't enhanced like she was. They didn't have superpowers, they relied on guns and other weapons. Faith relied on her magic and any hope she had on getting out alive. Of course, her siblings had her back so fighting the bad guys was a piece of cake.

Until Ben died.

That's when the final part of Faith's life unfolded. It was the final part that occurred during her remaining years at the Academy. The day Faith walked out was the day her story restarted.

The final part of Faith's story, at the Academy, began a little while before Ben's death. This part _actually_ began the day her other brother, Five, disappeared. Faith had a close relationship with Five, as she did with some of her other brothers, Ben included. She found herself being able to click with them, having the kind of brother-sister relationship that made living in the mansion easier. On the day Five disappeared, Faith was beginning to feel doubts plant themselves into her mind. She spent a number of years fighting crime at her father's command. She spent a number of years enduring his militaristic training, both physical and mental. Faith put up with so much of her father's crap that the excitement she'd initially feel for what she did was slowly starting to die down. Five's disappearance made those seeded doubts sprout quicker than she anticipated.

In the end, she chose to leave. It was in her best interest to go. She had to start a life for herself, for her own mental and emotional health. Reginald raised the kids in such an unhealthy way that it was difficult for any of the kids to be around each other. It seemed the one thing they all had in common, however, (excluding Luther) was an incredible hatred for Reginald.

Swallowing thickly, Faith tried to push those out of her head. She didn't want to think about it. She _really_ didn't want to think about it. The Hargreeves were dysfunctional enough as is, the last thing she wanted to do was remember all the bad times. It brought back too many emotions, ones she tried so hard to push down. Faith's life was going in a good direction, and the last thing she needed was to bring about hurtful memories and feelings.

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**(A/N):**

**Sorry for the wait on the chapter, but here it is! Hopefully you guys like it. If you've got any constructive criticism, don't hesitate to let it out, okay? I'd appreciate it.**

**Do I own anything in the MCU? No. No I don't. All I own are my OCs and my subplots. If you've got any ideas for OCs or subplots, PM me or leave a review. I'll add it in as soon as possible.**

**Thank you guys for being so patient with me. Hopefully I won't let you down again.**

**Anne Tonkin**


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